Chicken Limbo

Tried to post this yesterday, but blogger wasn't cooperating!


Yes, that is a children's game, but no, that is not what I am refering to today. I refer to this as my feeling for the day/week. The week because I think this feeling is going to perpetuate itself right on through to Friday.

I went to Michael and Jamie's on Saturday, spent the night, stayed until about 10 and then came back home. I was quite disappointed coming home, had alot of time to think and to pray. I was disappointed in several things that I saw with he and Jamie, but most of all I was disappointed in realizing that I can't force a relationship with him or Jamie, but I have to wait on them to grow up. I forget that in spite of the fact that they are married and live away from home and they are adults, that they are truely still kids. They play "house" with all of the responsibilities that go along with marriage but are in fact still very much self absorbed children. This parenting adult children gets harder and harder to figure out as time goes by, you think it would get easier, but no, it gets harder. I can see this situation repeating with Cricket and Bryan.

What saddens me the most about Michael and Jamie is not the immaturity but the realization that I now don't "know" or have a real relationship with the children that I gave birth to. This fact brings me to tears every time I think about it. Michael is probably the closest relationship I have, if you can call it a relationship.

Is it going to be like this with all of our children? I hope not...if it is this parenting thing is getting to be harder than I expected.

Later Tater!